I recently learned that the foundations of the audiophile world are being rocked, shaken and uprooted by a horrifying scandal that has already been dubbed MoFi-gate. Everything about this scandal is so hilarious I can’t stop giggling.

a record player
photo by Lee Campbell on Unsplash

MoFi is a company that produces vinyl records, the ones for Those Who Appreciate Quality Sound. Those Who Appreciate Quality Sound can’t listen to digital records, the spiritless digital sound is too harsh for their ears, so they listen to vinyl records, and spend enormous amounts of money on the gear that can make the best of the good old analog technology but still can not get rid of the pops and hissing (which TWAQS regard to be the marks of the sound quality, evidently).

MoFi is known for making very good records. Really good records, sounding, as a rule, better than the records made by other companies; some of the MoFi’s issues are widely regarded by TWAQS to be of exemplary sound quality. And making multiple copies of analog signal without its quality suffering is not an easy task; you can’t make endless amounts of records with a single set of laquers, the laquers degrade, and so do the analog sources in general when they are used. This all costs a lot of money, naturally, and TWAQS make a lot of fuss about MoFi records. Well, they did, until this summer.

It suddenly turned out that MoFi found a simple and elegant solution for the problem of making multiple high-quality copies from a single master-record. They convert the master-record to a digital file and use that digital file to produce constant-quality laquers in necessary amounts…

Obviously to anyone who visited at least some physics lessons in school, this is the single possible way to produce quality vinyl records. However, the poor TWAQS are shocked: their favourite best-of-the-best records are made from digital sources!!! The world is ending! What next, the sky falls on the ground?!

I’m not exaggerating. Look at Mike Ludwig, those are real tears in his eyes!

Requests to have all the records marked to tell those of the “Real Analog Quality” from those “Containing Digital Sources” are merely icing on this cake. TWAQS can’t be cured.

Meanwhile, the sane people who like good sound can’t wait for MoFi to digitally release their master-copies to the general public…