My Name Is Zhenya

This post was originally only published in Russian, but a post by  Ter[ence|ry] Eden prompted me translate it. Not unlike their British counterparts, the Russian names tend to have a full form and a (not always but usually) shorter “family form”. Multiple names are extremely rare in Russia; instead, to make it formal, a patronymic (derived from the father’s name) is added. The full legal name (as seen in our passports and other legal documents) consists the personal name (in its full form), the patronymic, and the family name (in passports and such it can go first instead of last). When using foreign languages, and English in particular, it is customary to omit the patronymic – it is a mouthful, and foreigners don’t get it, anyway.

My full legal name is Evgeny Vladimirovich Kuznetsov (my father’s name was Vladimir). The “family form” for Evgeny in Russian is most usually Zhenya. “Zh” denotes a sound that doesn’t exist in English, so for English I always us my full name; the post below only concerns Russian, and that’s why I didn’t even care to translate it initially.

My recent change of occupation led, understandably, to a number of (sometimes) minor changes in my life as a whole. Many of these were expected, yet there were some surprises. This one was particularly sudden and sizeable…

Like many people, I have comlicated relationship with my own name; in my case the thing is I never felt like a Zhenya. Many people called me that – in my family, in kindergarten, in primary school, and later the few colleagues I was on personal terms with. I didn’t object but neither did I really identify with this name. I should say that my friends have always got it: not a single one of my close friends has ever called me Zhenya¹, they always used other variants or handles – thankfully, in the non-medical circles of my home city the name “Doctor” (who’d have thought, right?) took hold rather quickly. To me, Zhenya was the little boy Zhenya Kuznetsov who, at some point in time, grew up and is no more present, except in memories and childhood traumas².

It’s hard to pinpoint the exact moment (must be before my graduation) when I started to introduce myself as Evgeny (whenever I didn’t have to be Evgeny Vladimirovich) but I can say I have always been comfortable wearing this name. The main page of this very website started with “My name is Evgeny” up until the last November…

Late last May, when I started my internship, the team lead introduced me in the team chat: here is our intern Zhenya, kindly meet. I remember the discomfort of these words rubbing me the wrong way – and I think it was the very last time I reacted this way to this name. In a week at the latest, I was surprised to find out that – at least here – my name is Zhenya, and that this is right and I am quite comfortable. And after some while, it turned out my name was Zhenya generally, as a rule, not only here; to the point that being addressed as “You, Zhenya” (where “You” was called for) became more comfortable for me that the “you, Evgeny” I lived half my life with. And that Zhenya is not only the boy from my childhood, but also this forty-years-old man who, apparently, had something in his life finally plugged in the right socket.

When a call-center support person asks how to address me, I answer: “Zhenya”. I’m a little surprised and happy about it each time.